Bin Laden gets binned...

Bin Laden used his mother as a human shield - they were a very close family, right up to the end..!

Two similar jokes..!

A man says to his wife, "Look, our sex life has got a bit boring. I think we should try something different..!"

"What have you got in mind?" she asks, rather doubtfully.

"Well one of my mates was telling me about the wheelbarrow - you get down on all fours and then I get behind and pick your back legs up and we take it from there...".

"Well, I'm not sure," says the wife, "I mean, we're not going to pass my mum's house, are we..?"

Two men discussing sex and one asks, "Have you tried the Rodeo position..?"

The other admits he hasn't and asks what it is.

"Well," said the other, " You get your wife to go down on all fours and you get behind her and catch her breasts."

"So why is it called the Rodeo position..?" asks the other, plainly puzzled.

"Oh, you tell her they feel just like her sisters, and then you try to stay on for eight second..!"

I know it was nothing I said...!

Linguistic researchers in South America, studying a dying tribal dialect, report being very frustrated as the very last two remaining members of the tribe are refusing to speak to each other..!

It is not know why they fell out...

We went for the light..!

Just had a week in the south of France - Anne said it would be a chance to do some painting - the bedroom..!

Seaside fun...

Theft for today..!

" A double glazing saleman hangs a fig leaf on a eunuch - then sells him insurance for it..!"

Too many medals..?

Its a kind of historical truism (all truisms are 'kind of') that when a war is being lost, they start handing out medals and near the end of a lost war, they can be given out for just turning up..!

In Afghanistan they're handing them out by the bushel...

Online at Barkings Bank....

The choir.....

I stood on the shoulders of giants...

Explain this...

I go to the Manor Street swimming baths in Chelsea. There are no individual changing rooms so everyone changes in public, individual men as well as crowds of school boys, mostly private schoolboys. Everyone has to change in the same open area.

Here's the thing. Most of the men and I mean a distinct majority, do not change from clothes to swim suit and back quickly or surreptitiously but rather pointedly take time off to parade around naked, usually talking loudly and animatedly to each other in poses that say, 'I'm so used to being naked in public that I don't notice that I'm doing it now'.

This fairly shrieks at you but the funny things is that they do it more when there's kids about.

Now if they were all universally well endowed there might be an obvious motive - but they are mostly not...and I don't think its latent paedophilia, there's just too many of them doing this, so why do they do it...?

Time to go to the barricades...

From Blair, so pathetically in thrall to a near moronic American president that he could follow him to war, while showing breathtaking contempt for the rest of us. We were dust beneath their wheels. So contemptious, they lifted their main argument for the war, the 45 minute claim, from a students blog while ignoring the biggest protest in British history, when over a million people turned out in London against it. This contemp seeps down from the top to be found in the detail of public life. Take the obscure case of Jeremy Bamber who has now served 25 years for murders the police framed him for...it was common knowledge, the prevasive rot is everywhere.

The political classes behave with complete impunity (Mandelson's history of bribe taking for e.g.) while the only people who go to prison are the whistle blowers. Our useless, corrupt police and public services only excel in excuses - while no one else in our rotten governing elite are ever culpable or arraigned - except maybe before John Humphries or Jeremy Paxman.

Awful as the idea is - we badly need a second Committee of Public Safety...